I come back for a humble request.

SpartanLord7 · January 28th, 2010, 03:47 AM

Hello PS1441. It's been quite sometime since I've been here. I am in major spiritual turmoil. I come here to ask for your prayers. A few years back something happened by accident and it slowly built up it's hold on me. Now it is a daily struggle to keep this temptation and soul killer under check. I'm not gonna lie. At this point, my soul is probably just about dead to God. I hate the sin that has a hold of me but I'm in so deep I can't get rid of it. It'll probably have me the rest of my life. I am so fed up with it and just want it to die. Satan is hitting me sooo hard right now. I can't fight this fight alone. Please, I need prayers. Not some quick 30 sec prayer, I'm talkin at least a couple minutes. Please, I can't go on like this any more. God Bless you all. Please ask the same for me.

garn-solo · January 28th, 2010, 10:37 AM

You've got my prayers.

Spartan - remember that NO sin has overtaken YOU that is not common to man. Although you find yourself enmeshed and gripped by a particular manifestation of sin (they are nearly endless in variety), you are not alone.

Please take a look at Romans 7, in which the apostle Paul speaks to the deep concern, anguish, and the ANSWER to such things.

Remember that although we are not free to simply disobey God without reservation - this is not your condition. The fact that you are so bothered by this is a clear evidence of God's GRACE to you and in you. His Holy Spirit dwells within all believers, and God will never let you go.

The really wonderful news of the gospel is that what we are simply unable to do - Christ has accomplished on the cross. We are saved NOT because of our performance... furthermore, we are not sustained by our performance. Only our Savior can do what must be done. We follow after and grow in both obedience, AND in a realization that we are actually no good at all, ever, and will always be dependent on the grace extended to us and maintained in Christ.

If I can be of service, please post so and I'll figure out a way we can get into closer contact.

schooch · January 29th, 2010, 12:28 AM

Praying! I will pray that you will be able to (though Christ) come over this sin

knappster104 · January 29th, 2010, 05:59 AM

SPartan, I will Definitely pray for you!!!

SpaceMarine[92] · January 29th, 2010, 11:19 PM

Hey dude I'm praying for you as well. I've been in a place same as you and in many ways I still am. But I learned from a wonderful holy man that no matter how much evil we might do. No matter how great or constant the sin. God will ALWAYS love us. Though we might cause a tear to run down the beautiful face of Christ Our Savior. He is always first to forgive us. He will even forgive us long before we forgive ourselves. The best we can do is love and serve him to the best of our abilities. We will sin. We are fallen. But we must never surrender to Satan. Despair is his greatest weapon against us. He is always there in our heads whispering that God could never forget such a sin as that. St. Augustine lived a horrible life before he came to God. If you want to talk please remember that I'm here and always can listen.

pillbox1234567 · February 3rd, 2010, 08:27 PM

i will pray. just remember that no matter what nothing can take you away from God. you will always be His

Jhn 10:28 and I give eternal life to them, and they will never perish; and no one will snatch them out of My hand.

Jhn 10:29 "My Father, who has given {them} to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch {them} out of the Father's hand.

joehay · February 10th, 2010, 01:12 PM

I just want you to know you are in my prayers.Am I am not just saying that I am serious. :)
Remember God will never forsake or leave you,ALWAYS remember that.

SpartanLord7 · February 18th, 2010, 04:52 PM

thanx everyone. Im doin better in mentioned sin. But, I need prayers for something else. It isnt sinful, it is depressing, beyond anything I have ever experienced.

2 years ago I met a girl while on a Catholic Teen Conference. It was a 3 day trip in San Diego and by the time it was up I was totally crushing on this girl. And, from what I could tell, she liked me. I saw her 2 weeks later for a "reunion" thing for the participants of the conference. I live 4 hours from her so I was totally looking forward to hanging out with her. Again I got the same feeling of connection. Unfortunately after that night I wasnt able to see her for another 5 months. I finally made it up there in February of 2009 and got to talk to her for like 10 mins. I asked her for her number and she gave it to me. Although it took me quite a while (meaning like 3 months to work up the courage to call her) After that I started talking with her every couple weeks and then recently it got to the point I was talking to her a couple times a week. Not that u need to know this, Im just trying to help you understand whats bringing me down.

Back up a little bit. The July after I got her number, we had planned to go to Magic Mountain, which she had to skip out on cause she was going to LA and had to get rdy to leave. I was rly bummed about that. 2 weeks later we had another Youth conference in San Diego. She seemed excited to see me, but she didnt rly interact with me during the trip. I would catch her glancing at me and the occasional smile, so I thought maybe she was nervous about talking to me as I was about talking to her. I didnt get to see her for most of the bus ride back. Just at the exit I left, I got to say bye to her.

I started calling/txting her more after that. Another 5 months later (5 days ago) I saw her again at her Church. I was totally nervous and really really excited about seeing her. I got to talk to her for like 5 minz before Church. After mass was over, is when it went down hill. I wanted to talk to her but she would hardly look at me. 10 mins of pain later, we left. As I was leaving I saw her and another guy together and my heart just sunk. She is one of those people that likes giving people hugs and holding their hands so I was hoping maybe they were just friends.

I had a really horrible feeling though. My fears were confirmed when I got in touch with a mutual friend who told me she did have a boyfriend. When I found out it was true I about died.

I fell into total depression and have been utterly out of my normal state of mind. Im not sure if they were dating before I met her or if it was sometime recently. Whenever it was, she has hurt me allot. She let me believe maybe we could have a future together, let me conjure up dreams of a happy future, then she totally crushed them, without even telling me. She still doesnt know I know. I dont know whether or not she knew I liked her and if she purposely wasn't telling me she had a boyfriend, or if she didnt even think about it and only thought of us as friends. Whatever it is, she wasn't truthful with me, led me on like a hungry dog, and then dumped me into an abyss of darkness. Ive never felt so alone or depressed. It hurts so much.

I don't know what Im gonna do if I see her again. I only hope she didnt know I had feelings for her. It would mean she didnt know I would get hurt. But, she did lead me on, which makes it soo much worse. She let me believe she liked me back...

So after 2 years of thinking about her every day, my dreams have been crushed and I can't ever enjoy seeing her again, not after this experience. Im completely crushed and feel rejected. If she had told me, and not left me hanging, I would have been totally bummed but it would have been easier. Instead she hid it from me and finally ignored me altogether. I know Valentines day isn't what its supposed to be, but it totally figures that this would all happen the day before...All I can say is worst Valentines ever.

Im sorry this is so long, but I really need to let it out and I think this would be a good place. As u can see I still need as many prayers as possible. I am praying God has let this happen for a reason. Maybe He has something better planned for me, maybe someone who is more spiritual and can help me with my struggles. Only He knows...I don't think I will get over this for a long long time, but I can only pray something happens to change me and make me a happier person.

Thanks for taking the time. U have no idea how much I would appreciate it if even only 1 person said a 5 second prayer. It hurts, and I will take anything right now to help it.

God Bless.

schooch · February 22nd, 2010, 02:08 PM

will pray Spartan!

GIJOE20 · February 22nd, 2010, 05:57 PM

Praying

XerOTheMage · February 22nd, 2010, 07:50 PM

wow...i'm praying... i know how that feels... sorta... but i know that hurts alot... felt it first hand... and the only thing else i can say is that God was directing it cuz if what happened didn't i would've been hurting alot more and longer than i did for those few weeks. so... i will pray. and you see if it was God showing you that she isn't the one for you and he's got a better plan or something else... if you want to hear my story Spartan PM me your email. it might help you alittle...

knappster104 · February 22nd, 2010, 09:29 PM

Still praying for you bro!

aj918 · February 22nd, 2010, 11:41 PM

praying!

Daarrve · February 23rd, 2010, 12:40 AM

definately praying for ya spartan.

Skillet2 · March 19th, 2010, 10:52 PM

got ya in my prayers.

January 28th, 2010, 03:47 AM	#1
SpartanLord7 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Sunny SoCal Age: 17 Posts: 1,431	I come back for a humble request. Hello PS1441. It's been quite sometime since I've been here. I am in major spiritual turmoil. I come here to ask for your prayers. A few years back something happened by accident and it slowly built up it's hold on me. Now it is a daily struggle to keep this temptation and soul killer under check. I'm not gonna lie. At this point, my soul is probably just about dead to God. I hate the sin that has a hold of me but I'm in so deep I can't get rid of it. It'll probably have me the rest of my life. I am so fed up with it and just want it to die. Satan is hitting me sooo hard right now. I can't fight this fight alone. Please, I need prayers. Not some quick 30 sec prayer, I'm talkin at least a couple minutes. Please, I can't go on like this any more. God Bless you all. Please ask the same for me. __________________ Though I walk through the valley of death, I shall fear no evil. For Thy rod and Thy staff, they comfort me.

January 28th, 2010, 10:37 AM	#2
garn-solo PS1441 Team Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Gaithersburg, MD Posts: 2,599	You've got my prayers. Spartan - remember that NO sin has overtaken YOU that is not common to man. Although you find yourself enmeshed and gripped by a particular manifestation of sin (they are nearly endless in variety), you are not alone. Please take a look at Romans 7, in which the apostle Paul speaks to the deep concern, anguish, and the ANSWER to such things. Remember that although we are not free to simply disobey God without reservation - this is not your condition. The fact that you are so bothered by this is a clear evidence of God's GRACE to you and in you. His Holy Spirit dwells within all believers, and God will never let you go. The really wonderful news of the gospel is that what we are simply unable to do - Christ has accomplished on the cross. We are saved NOT because of our performance... furthermore, we are not sustained by our performance. Only our Savior can do what must be done. We follow after and grow in both obedience, AND in a realization that we are actually no good at all, ever, and will always be dependent on the grace extended to us and maintained in Christ. If I can be of service, please post so and I'll figure out a way we can get into closer contact. __________________ I am *Amazed* by God's grace in sending his only son to die for sin and without a clue why he should save me, why I should be the recipient of his love, Garn

January 29th, 2010, 12:28 AM	#3
schooch PS1441 Team Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Infront of you Age: 19 Posts: 6,191	Praying! I will pray that you will be able to (though Christ) come over this sin __________________

January 29th, 2010, 05:59 AM	#4
knappster104 PS1441 Team Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Pennsylvania Age: 31 Posts: 3,030	SPartan, I will Definitely pray for you!!! __________________ It's All Good!!!

January 29th, 2010, 11:19 PM	#5
SpaceMarine[92] Registered User Join Date: May 2007 Location: Oak View, CA Posts: 981	Hey dude I'm praying for you as well. I've been in a place same as you and in many ways I still am. But I learned from a wonderful holy man that no matter how much evil we might do. No matter how great or constant the sin. God will ALWAYS love us. Though we might cause a tear to run down the beautiful face of Christ Our Savior. He is always first to forgive us. He will even forgive us long before we forgive ourselves. The best we can do is love and serve him to the best of our abilities. We will sin. We are fallen. But we must never surrender to Satan. Despair is his greatest weapon against us. He is always there in our heads whispering that God could never forget such a sin as that. St. Augustine lived a horrible life before he came to God. If you want to talk please remember that I'm here and always can listen. __________________ I Have: kept a watchful eye on swimmers, offered parents peace of mind and trained hard to respond in a heartbeat. I am a Lifeguard.

February 3rd, 2010, 08:27 PM	#6
pillbox1234567 PS1441 Team Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Wylie, Texas Age: 16 Posts: 3,548	i will pray. just remember that no matter what nothing can take you away from God. you will always be His Jhn 10:28 and I give eternal life to them, and they will never perish; and no one will snatch them out of My hand. Jhn 10:29 "My Father, who has given {them} to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch {them} out of the Father's hand. __________________

February 10th, 2010, 01:12 PM	#7
joehay PS1441 Team Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Severn,Maryland Posts: 159	I just want you to know you are in my prayers.Am I am not just saying that I am serious. :) Remember God will never forsake or leave you,ALWAYS remember that. __________________

February 18th, 2010, 04:52 PM	#8
SpartanLord7 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Sunny SoCal Age: 17 Posts: 1,431	thanx everyone. Im doin better in mentioned sin. But, I need prayers for something else. It isnt sinful, it is depressing, beyond anything I have ever experienced. 2 years ago I met a girl while on a Catholic Teen Conference. It was a 3 day trip in San Diego and by the time it was up I was totally crushing on this girl. And, from what I could tell, she liked me. I saw her 2 weeks later for a "reunion" thing for the participants of the conference. I live 4 hours from her so I was totally looking forward to hanging out with her. Again I got the same feeling of connection. Unfortunately after that night I wasnt able to see her for another 5 months. I finally made it up there in February of 2009 and got to talk to her for like 10 mins. I asked her for her number and she gave it to me. Although it took me quite a while (meaning like 3 months to work up the courage to call her) After that I started talking with her every couple weeks and then recently it got to the point I was talking to her a couple times a week. Not that u need to know this, Im just trying to help you understand whats bringing me down. Back up a little bit. The July after I got her number, we had planned to go to Magic Mountain, which she had to skip out on cause she was going to LA and had to get rdy to leave. I was rly bummed about that. 2 weeks later we had another Youth conference in San Diego. She seemed excited to see me, but she didnt rly interact with me during the trip. I would catch her glancing at me and the occasional smile, so I thought maybe she was nervous about talking to me as I was about talking to her. I didnt get to see her for most of the bus ride back. Just at the exit I left, I got to say bye to her. I started calling/txting her more after that. Another 5 months later (5 days ago) I saw her again at her Church. I was totally nervous and really really excited about seeing her. I got to talk to her for like 5 minz before Church. After mass was over, is when it went down hill. I wanted to talk to her but she would hardly look at me. 10 mins of pain later, we left. As I was leaving I saw her and another guy together and my heart just sunk. She is one of those people that likes giving people hugs and holding their hands so I was hoping maybe they were just friends. I had a really horrible feeling though. My fears were confirmed when I got in touch with a mutual friend who told me she did have a boyfriend. When I found out it was true I about died. I fell into total depression and have been utterly out of my normal state of mind. Im not sure if they were dating before I met her or if it was sometime recently. Whenever it was, she has hurt me allot. She let me believe maybe we could have a future together, let me conjure up dreams of a happy future, then she totally crushed them, without even telling me. She still doesnt know I know. I dont know whether or not she knew I liked her and if she purposely wasn't telling me she had a boyfriend, or if she didnt even think about it and only thought of us as friends. Whatever it is, she wasn't truthful with me, led me on like a hungry dog, and then dumped me into an abyss of darkness. Ive never felt so alone or depressed. It hurts so much. I don't know what Im gonna do if I see her again. I only hope she didnt know I had feelings for her. It would mean she didnt know I would get hurt. But, she did lead me on, which makes it soo much worse. She let me believe she liked me back... So after 2 years of thinking about her every day, my dreams have been crushed and I can't ever enjoy seeing her again, not after this experience. Im completely crushed and feel rejected. If she had told me, and not left me hanging, I would have been totally bummed but it would have been easier. Instead she hid it from me and finally ignored me altogether. I know Valentines day isn't what its supposed to be, but it totally figures that this would all happen the day before...All I can say is worst Valentines ever. Im sorry this is so long, but I really need to let it out and I think this would be a good place. As u can see I still need as many prayers as possible. I am praying God has let this happen for a reason. Maybe He has something better planned for me, maybe someone who is more spiritual and can help me with my struggles. Only He knows...I don't think I will get over this for a long long time, but I can only pray something happens to change me and make me a happier person. Thanks for taking the time. U have no idea how much I would appreciate it if even only 1 person said a 5 second prayer. It hurts, and I will take anything right now to help it. God Bless. __________________ Though I walk through the valley of death, I shall fear no evil. For Thy rod and Thy staff, they comfort me.

February 22nd, 2010, 02:08 PM	#9
schooch PS1441 Team Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Infront of you Age: 19 Posts: 6,191	will pray Spartan! __________________

February 22nd, 2010, 05:57 PM	#10
GIJOE20 PS1441 Team Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Palmetto Florida Posts: 833	Praying __________________

February 22nd, 2010, 07:50 PM	#11
XerOTheMage PS1441 Team Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: In an undergound dungeon fighting a Troll with myu elven sword Age: 15 Posts: 2,253	wow...i'm praying... i know how that feels... sorta... but i know that hurts alot... felt it first hand... and the only thing else i can say is that God was directing it cuz if what happened didn't i would've been hurting alot more and longer than i did for those few weeks. so... i will pray. and you see if it was God showing you that she isn't the one for you and he's got a better plan or something else... if you want to hear my story Spartan PM me your email. it might help you alittle... __________________ Semper Fi

February 22nd, 2010, 09:29 PM	#12
knappster104 PS1441 Team Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Pennsylvania Age: 31 Posts: 3,030	Still praying for you bro! __________________ It's All Good!!!

February 22nd, 2010, 11:41 PM	#13
aj918 PS1441 Team Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Wagoner, OK Posts: 994	praying! __________________ In the absence of orders, go blow something up!!

February 23rd, 2010, 12:40 AM	#14
Daarrve PS1441 Team Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Auburn, Ontario, Canada Age: 50 Posts: 2,828	definately praying for ya spartan. __________________

March 19th, 2010, 10:52 PM	#15
Skillet2 PS1441 Team Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Velva,ND Age: 17 Posts: 2,126	got ya in my prayers. __________________

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